December 23, 2009

AVATAR: MY FINAL WORD

From a professional point of view, every writer, every actor, every producer, every audience member, every everybody interested in film should pray, and I mean right now and every day that Avatar becomes a huge success, and the reason for this is simple...

Avatar is the first original big budget crowd-pleaser that has been released in years and years and years. It's not a remake (and the first one to come with the waaah waaah of It Dances With Smurfs will get whacked over the head with my original hardcover edition of Dune , because obviously people don't have a memory that goes further back than 10 to 15 years, max), it is not based on a toyline, it is not a damn costumed comic book on the screen, it was written and developed originally and solely for the big screen.

So please, everybody, continue to hope for it to fail so you can return to watching Jon & Kate Fuck 8 , please go on, I dare you...

.. already there is barely any original bid budget left, and the audience is being squeezed between small My Life Is So Important, More Important Than Yours independent bullshit biopics and dreadfully retarded toy movies. We are already in a world where to executives Monopoly: The Movie sounds like a GREAT IDEA, okay? We are in a world where spec scripts barely sell, if they are original, and the spec on top of the Black List is a take on Jim Henson's life, dun dun dun! We are in a world where everything needs to be cross-platform-developed, which is bullshit.

Avatar is the first original big budget mainstream movie since perhaps even Matrix . Is it perfect? No. But to those who claim that Cameron is a bad writer, I say this: writing is a lot more than just dialogue lines, okay? He was never the best dialogue writer and never will be. But writing – as any real writer could attest is about storytelling, and he delivers a great story. Gosh, the humans are somewhat flat and two-dimensional. Like I said in my previous post, it never bothered you when the invaders were the aliens in Independence Day or the hordes of Mordor in Lord of the Rings , and Cameron reverses that. How dare he? How the fuck dare he?

Could he have given them a bit more depth? Yes, definitely. Could have been easily done. Change Ribisi's speech about Unobtainium (and for those who laugh, maybe ask a few science friends, it is a joke in scientific communities to call the perfect element, the one that will solve all problems, unobtanium, duh, the joke's on you)... add a little to it that, if we can't get the damn thing, hell, Sigourney, you think everybody on Earth wants to sleep without the heat on. Little things, yeah, but doesn't change the thrust of the story. It's an invasion story. Only this time we are the bad guys. Ooooops.

And the scene in which Zoe Saldana's heart breaks after she realises the man she loves has betrayed her, is very likely the one who is responsible for killing them all, and it is done for about a minute, and it is done without words. The way she cannot look at him, the way she cannot stand it. You know what that's called? Writing and directing (and acting, but then again, I already kissed Saldan's butt in my previous post).

But please. Continue. Just don't you dare whine and bitch when the next slew of big movies coming out are going to be Backgammon: The Movie and Hasbro: The Epic Saga .