June 3, 2010

WANTED FOR CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY


NAME:
MAHMUD AHMADINEDSCHAD

PROFESSION:
PRESIDENT OF THE ISLAMIC REPUBLIC OF IRAN

CRIMES:
BRUTAL SUPPRESSION OF HIS OWN COUNTRYMEN, INCARCARATION OF JOURNALISTS, OPPOSITION AND THE DESPERATE DESIRE TO DESTROY ISRAEL FOR JUST BEING THERE

CLAIM TO FAME:
TRIES TO GO NUCLEAR, THINKS THAT GIVES HIM A BIGGER PENIS

QUOTE:
"HOLOCAUST? WHAT HOLOCAUST?"

One of the things that always gets me is how utterly batshit insane people can get. Mr. Iran here is one of the most prominent examples. It's not even that he wants his state to be a nuclear power (after all, others around the world have just as small a penis as he does, Pakistan, anybody? Israel? India? China? Russia? The United States? What is it with people and rockets? And atomic ejaculation on the soil of another country? Boah! We have nukes! We can kill you! Yeah, I am so impressed. Why don't you do something more useful with your time, like, oh, I don't know... build hospitals?).


It's two things. The fact that last year he had his thugs brutally disperse people on the streets of Tehran after they contested the election results, which from all indications were falsified and forged. So that whole "democracy" thing is only good, if it gets you in power, but Allah fuck you if it wouldn't, right? You know, you cannot take criticism seriously if it comes from a man (and the religious leadership of Iran backing him) who does exactly the same thing that the Shah did. Order the murder, the rape and the torture of innocent people because they do not agree with you. But then again, that has been the way of Iran since we (well, not really "we", but who? Oh yes, the United States, the UK and... BP! Yes, there they are again!) overthrew the last properly elected Iranian government in 1953.

And installed our murder puppet.

Which was overthrown. And replaced. By another murder puppet. And then another. And then another. Until we have come to Mahmud. I can call you, Mahmud, can I? After all, your speeches at the UN, at conferences, on TV... they all make me feel like we know each other personally. You know, like we met at a café, I had to endure your speeches of how you apparently have a direct line to Allah, that the Jews are the root of all evil (and they're not, be glad that they don't charge you copyright fees for your use of their god, they have good lawyers, no really, they do) and that alone makes me either want to leave said café or strangle you, whatever comes first.

But it's not even that.

It's the fact that you, Mahmud, dare to open that bearded piece of shit you call your mouth and state – on numerous occasions – that the Holocaust never happened. Guess you never went to one of the concentration camps, did you? Guess you never bothered to look at the bones and rotten bags of flesh that were left, buried only inches below the ground of the soft, muddy German and Polish soil. And why should you? It would only get in the way of your own beliefs. Facts have a tendency to destroy faith. And we can't have that, now, can we? There is a reason that we had an age of enlightenment. There is a reason why – after hundreds and hundreds of years of stupid, religious and race-motivated wars, we in Europe simply became fed up with it. Once Nazi Germany finally crossed the line. And killed other white folks (what? Jews? White folks? Yes, really... so to that other side of the equation, the Neo-Nazis and "Semi-Christians", shut up, Jews are not a race, never have been a race, never will be a race).

You, Mahmud, use the Jews the way Hitler used them. As scapegoats. And to distract from your own murders, your own lies, your own crimes against humanity. Forgetting, as all powerful "leaders" do, that each life, each person is sacred. That each human being has the same rights. And if you had actually read the Quran – instead of just picking out the things that back up your own twisted, warped and murderous sociopathic mind – you would know that Allah does not look kindly on those who murder. Or order the murder of a single man, woman or child.

But I suspect you will not care. You have not cared in the past. You will not care in the future. As long as you are in power. But hope that Allah will show you the mercy you have not shown to those that you should have – by your very position, by the power you hold – protected, that you should have cared for. You won't be held accountable in an International Court of Law. I know that. But you should be.