January 7, 2011


If you want to get an HBO series these days, you either apparently have to be (a) very famous and be, like Martin Scorsese or Kate Winslet, or (b) be a really bad actress/director, who for some reason thinks that this, yes, this right up there... is how life works. You know, the "hipster" way. You know, the kind of shit that we have already done with Reality Bites... a long time ago, and that one had Winona Ryder and a brilliant, little song called "Stay" by Lisa Loeb (wondered what happened to her).

I mean, what the hell? What does it say about today's industry when even the hipster shit of 17 years ago was better than that? I mean, seriously. And fuck yes, I do want you to get off my lawn, too!

But hey, what do I know, because I am not the daughter of somebody famous, like all the others involved here, in this venture, called Girls.
The pay cable network has picked up to series Girls, Lena Dunham's comedy pilot executive produced by Judd Apatow and Jenni Konner. The 24-year-old prodigy Dunham wrote, directed and starred in the pilot, about the assorted humiliations and rare triumphs of three girlfriends in their early 20s: Hannah (Dunham), an eternal intern at a publishing house in SoHo and a hopeful writer; Marnie (Allison Williams), a sexy, bitchy and ambitious assistant at a slick political PR firm whose goal id to practice environmental law; and Jessa (Jemima Kirke), a space cadet with hippie tendencies who wants to be an artist/educator. The parallels with Sex and the City don't stop here. Like Carrie, Hannah has a handsome carpenter as a boyfriend too, played by Adam Driver. Dunham, who served as co-executive producer on the pilot, is being upped to executive producer for the series alongside Apatow and Konner. She has been garnering awards attention for her second feature Tiny Furniture. Illene S. Landress is joining the project as a co-executive producer. The series marks the professional debut of Williams, daughter of NBC Nightly News anchor Brian Williams, who booked the HBO pilot shortly after graduating from Yale last year. Additionally, the project co-stars another famous offspring, David Mamet's daughter Zosia.
So, one girl is an eternal intern (who exactly does that work, unless you have very rich parents?), we have one corproate bitch who actually wants to save the world (probably without losing her dance club pass and the three free appletinis per night) and a space cadet, yes, a space cadet who wants to be an artist in New York. Or maybe an educator. Or something.

I am just shaking my head at the creative brilliance that makes it onto television these days, and yes, I am bitchy. I have the right to be bitchy. The producers I was in touch with regarding THE CAGE, and hey, these people only produced BRAVEHEART, THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST and APOCALYPTO, among other things, they got told by HBO that the folks over there wouldn't even think about looking at the pitch, because I didn't have an agent. I had producers, but no agent.

Perhaps I should have been squeezed out of a famous person's vagina. Or gone to Yale. Or just be, you know, more hip. Yes, I am bitchy. This is exactly the reason why I don't even want to talk to Hollywood people anymore. Because in the end, quality doesn't matter. No, really, it doesn't. And yes, THE CAGE was high quality.

And sometime during this year, I will prove that to you.